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** "If you can't
be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning."
Catherine
** "When I was
young, I was put in a school for retarded kids for two years before they realized I actually had a hearing loss. And they
called ME slow!"
Kathy Buckley
** "I'm not offended
by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb .. and I'm also not blonde."
Dolly Parton
** "I'm not going
to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on."
Roseanne Barr
** "Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission."
Eleanor Roosevelt
** "I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time
I leave a man I keep his house."
ZsaZsa Gabor
** "I have yet
to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career."
Gloria Steinem
"Inside every older person, there's a younger person....wondering
what the hell happened."
Cora Harvey Armstrong
"I refuse to think of them as chin hairs. I think
of them as stray eyebrows."
Janette Barber
"A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature
to stop speech when words become superfluous."
Ingrid Bergman
"My second favorite household chore is ironing. My
first being, hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint."
Erma
Bombeck
"I tried to commit suicide by sticking my head in
the oven, but there was a cake in it."
Lesley Boone
"Winston, you're drunk!"
Bessie Braddock to Churchill
"Bessie,
you're ugly, and tomorrow morning I shall be sober."
Churchill to Bessie Braddock
"The really frightening thing about middle age is
the knowledge that you'll grow out of it."
Doris Day
"Old age ain't no place for sissies."
Bette Davis
"Life
is very important to Americans."
Bob Dole
"Great spirits have
always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit
to hereditary prejudices but honestly and courageously uses his
intelligence."
Albert Einstein
"I am free of all prejudices.
I hate everyone equally."
W.C. Fields
"A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what he can't."
Rhonda Hansome
"The hardest years in life are those between ten
and seventy...."
Helen Hayes (at 73)
"They'll always be an England, even if it's
in Hollywood."
Bob Hope
"Women should be obscene and not heard."
Groucho Marx
"Real happiness is when
you marry a girl for love and find out later she has money."
Bob Monkhouse
"My sister's expecting a
baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt."
Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player
"I have always strenuously supported the right
of every man to his own opinion, however different that opinion might be to mine. He who denies another
this right makes a slave of himself to his present opinion, because he precludes himself the right of changing
it."
Thomas Paine
"Oh, life is a glorious cycle
of song, A medley of extemporanea; And love is a thing that can never go wrong; And I am Marie of Roumania."
Dorothy Parker
"The two most beautiful words in the English language
are `check enclosed'."
Dorothy Parker
"My dad is black and Italian. My mom is a mixture
of a bunch of things. I don't consider myself part of any race. I'm just a human being, I suppose."
Prince
"A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people
going to the polls."
Dan Quayle
"To educate a man in mind
and not in morals is to educate a menace to society."
Theodore Roosevelt
"England and America are two countries separated
by the same language."
George Bernard Shaw
"You tried, and you failed,
so the lesson is, never try."
Homer J. Simpson
"A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who
never owned a car."
Carrie Snow
"Traffic is very heavy at
the moment, so if you're thinking of leaving now, you'd better set off a few minutes earlier."
Traffic Reporter - BBC Radio
"Things are going to get a lot worse before they
get worse."
Lily Tomlin
"The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer
somebody else up."
Mark Twain
"Every time I close the
door on reality it comes in through the windows."
Jennifer Unlimited
"Whatever women must do they must do twice as well
as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult."
Charlotte Whitton
"Life is like a jar of jalapenos, what you do today might burn your ass tomorrow."
Author Unknown
"Never argue with an idiot. They will only bring
you down to their level and beat you with experience."
Author Unknown
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